Monday, May 5, 2008

Marriage Monday - "The Crazy Way We Met"

Not too long ago my mother and I were talking about the new trend toward “courtship” among some of the more conservative Christian and/or homeschooling families. Mother had heard a program about it on Focus on the Family and she was telling me that even though we didn’t call it “courting” that was pretty much what we practiced in our family back in the 1980s. Our parents didn’t say we couldn’t “date” in high school, but they did impress on us that having a serious relationship with someone of the opposite sex was serious business and best not entered into until we were old enough to begin considering marriage. That’s why I did not have a serious “boyfriend” until I was in college. It came about like this:

Once upon a time...

During my senior year of high school (in Ohio) my plans were to go to Bible college in Indiana the following year. Rachel (my aunt) had graduated the year before and was already there. She had already connected with her future husband and so she was scoping out the other guys for me! At Christmas time the college choir went on tour. She was in the choir and when they came to our church, she told me, “Karla, I think you ought to like Lyle.” He was also in the choir and beyond knowing who he was, I didn’t know anything about him… and for sure, he didn’t know who I was… but she expected me to just start “liking” him! We had been reading Romeo and Juliet in English class, so I quoted to her one of Juliet’s lines: “I’ll look to like if looking liking moves!”

Of course they weren’t there long enough for me to do much “looking”… but I thought about it all the next spring.

In May the college hosted an all-day open house for prospective students, so my family went. And, I “looked” some more! But from a distance. I did not have the nerve to approach Lyle to strike up a conversation. I didn’t think that would be very ladylike anyway. I was impressed with what I saw, but I was pretty sure that Lyle still had no idea who I was. So Rachel decided to help things along!

The college PR team was scheduled to be at our church in a couple of weeks. Rachel was in the "ladies trio", and Lyle was the sound technician for the team. During their tour Rachel recruited the help of the other girls in the trio and they started telling him about me. Rachel showed him my senior picture… and by the time they came to our church he was interested in getting to know me.

The funniest part is that my sisters (twins) are only 18 months younger than I am, and at that time we looked a good bit alike. So when the PR group came into the parsonage (our home) after the service, Lyle had to ask someone which one I was! We have laughed about that since then, because while we may have looked alike, my personality is totally different than either one of my sisters.

At the end of the evening Lyle asked if he could write to me. He was going home to California for the summer, but we would both be at Bible college in the fall. I was happy to give him my address. (And I have all those wonderful hand-written letters as a treasured keepsake because, of course, that was before the days of email!)

That was the beginning of our friendship. As we got to know each other that summer and fall we discovered that we really were a perfect fit... and that God meant us for each other.

It’s hard to believe that was 25 years ago! Time truly does fly when you’re having fun!

And we lived happily ever after!

Naturally there were quite a few more details between "Once upon a time..." and "...happily ever after", but the assignment for this month was to write about "the crazy way we met" so I'll save the other details for another time.
1st Monday Every Month at Chrysalis
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Faith said...

Nice testimony.
I never could really tell the difference though between courting and dating as a me they are the same things. Unless you are just dating to go out with tons of different guys...which I never did anyways, nor will I let my daughters while they are teens.
This was a fun topic, reliving our early days!
God bless you!

the160acrewoods said...

25 years! congrat's! that is a wonderful love story!!

e-Mom said...

What a perfect courtship story! Isn't it wonderful to have friends/aunts like Rachel? I'm sure you'll be grateful to her forever. :~D (Lol, nearly "triplets," eh?)

Congratulations on 20+ years of marriage. What a wonderful testimony of your faith in God.

Blessings, e-Mom @ Chrysalis

Connie Marie said...

I love how you followed your parents advice, not to get involved unless you are ready to be married. That is great advice but one that many do not heed.

I am glad you were blessed with a Christian husband.

May God continue to bless in your life and marriage.

Susan said...

Hi Karla,

So nice to meet you! I really enjoyed reading about your courtship, how beautiful!

I'm glad you joined us today.

I'll be back!

Aliene said...

Lovely! But I sure am glad Lyle got you sisters straight. You could have had him for a brother-in-law. But God does have someone special for each of us and I'm glad to finally know how you met.
Guess I might try if I can get the nerve. We will have our 50th in Nov. 14th. You are on your way!

Aunt Lene

A Romantic Porch said...

Karla what an adorable story, and from my part, I never realized that I factored into the story so...shall I say... "significantly". Well,I'm glad I did! Kinda makes me feel a little happy tickle! xo "aunt" Rachel

P.S. The picture of the two of you on the bench is SO cute. I don't think we have any of us like that.

The Going Blog said...

I love details and true love stories. Great post!

Farrah said...

I didn't picture Rachel as a matchmaker type! But there it is, plain as day in writing! Now I understand the significance of "Romantic Porch!" Does she have one of those things...what do you call 'em? Oh yeah! I'll bet she has a flirting bench on the porch! LOL!

Love that sweet, sweet photo! Awwwww!

Toots said...

Thanks for sharing that, Karla! I so enjoyed hearing how you met.

Lori said...

Oh, I just loved your story!


Constance said...

Sweet and tender! I loved your story. There's a lot to be said about the dating process, it's treated much too casually. Speaking from first-hand experience sadly! Thanks for sharing!

MiPa said...

Lovely story! Bless you!